Not good. Not good at all.

November 18, 2008

I had a woe-is-me moment on Sunday night that led to me treating myself to a nice sushi dinner to cheer myself up.

This turned out to be a terrible idea because I’ve had to call in sick yesterday and today due to The Worst Fucking Food Poisoning I Have Ever Had.

I woke up an hour before my alarm on Monday morning, feeling very hungry. I rolled around in discomfort and gagged once or twice before I realized that this wasn’t just hunger I was feeling. I rocketed out of bed and very nearly missed the toilet with my projectile vomit. Pretty soon, the toilet was full of half-digested sushi debris that had been inside my body just seconds before.

The violent vomiting continued and soon it was coming out of both ends. Sorry for the disgusting visual, I’m just trying to convey how bad this was.

After the first round, I got back into bed, sweating and covered in goosebumps. I thought that was the last of it, since I was already feeling much better. Then came round two.

I spent the rest of the afternoon puking and shitting my guts out and half-sleeping in the interim. I thrashed around in my bed, tearing the covers off when I felt too hot and shivering under two blankets when I was cold. I literally ran to the bathroom at least twenty times and by three o’clock, I had purged everything my body had to offer.

I was pretty worried that I was super dehydrated at that point, since I couldn’t even keep down any water. I was tempted to drag myself down to the store to pick up a big bottle of Gatorade for all it’s electrolyte goodness, but decided not to out of fear that I’d pass out on the way.

I started to panic because I really didn’t want to be alone when I was as sick as I was so I called my mom crying and she came to pick me up and bring me back to my parent’s house where I’ve been ever since.

I’m feeling better now, but I still feel like complete ass and I haven’t consumed anything but Gatorade, apple juice and gingerale since Sunday night. I must have been utlra dehydrated because I drank 1 liter of Gatorade and the equivalent in gingerale and apple juice around three yesterday afternoon and I only just peed this morning, and it wasn’t nearly anything close to the amount of liquid I drank.

I hate calling in sick. I always feel like I’m lying, even when I’m practically dying. Oh snap, I could be a rapper.

Also, I did not go on the internet AT ALL yesterday. You know you’re super sick when…


2 Responses to “Not good. Not good at all.”

  1. shibooya Says:

    I would listen to your music if you made your vomit into a rap. Word!

  2. Cristina Says:

    If my rap flow is anything like my vomit flow, I’d have money in the bank.

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